just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
