remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
