I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
it's great music for shaving your balls
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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