If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
