No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
