but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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