Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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