he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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