Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
third nipple confirmed
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
My bed smells like the plague
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