Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I wish you could order shots online.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
