I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
only you would photoshop your dick
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize