I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
