Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
