Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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