What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
