SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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