Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
