Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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