oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
