I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
