i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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