There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
