I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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