sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
