My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
