i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
