I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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