Christians are straight up FREAKS
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
4 words: hood of his car
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
