some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
