he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
