I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
