I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize