so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
