he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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