At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
