Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I deserve this hangover.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
