I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
