It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
