I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
