Taylor Swift is so right about you.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
