I think I am morally bankrupt
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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