The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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