I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
