I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You made out with two different species that night
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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