this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
