I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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