I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
