am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Houston, we have a squirter
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
