There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize