so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
